‘quiet’ by susan cain is one of those books that is so hyped, one just expects to love it—at least if you are an introverted idealist who loves reading in general and psychology in particular.
but to my surprise, i didn’t. now, don’t get me wrong, i didn’t hate it either. it’s a solid book. i just didn’t love-LOVE it, which was somehow both disappointing and confusing.
i tried to figure out why that might be, and what i came up with is this: the content of the book simply wasn’t what i expected.
for one, it was written by a lawyer-turned-consultant and not by a psychological researcher, as i had somehow assumed. i don’t know why that bothered me as much as it did, but i suspect it’s linked to my next point.
cain does attempt to capture different facets of introversion, providing an overview of the phenomenon, including a lengthy history of how humankind came to revere extroversion. however, in my opinion, all of this—the linked concepts such as high sensitivity or society’s love for the extroverted—felt like cherry-picking some points while missing others.
again, it was all really interesting, but for a book that is often referred to as the ‘bible for introverts’, i expected a more complete, more scientific picture of introversion. it left me wondering what was left out.
which brings me to my last point of contention:
i understand that authors of nonfiction books like to rely on examples and narrative storytelling to engage the reader, provide context, and weave their points into a coherent whole. but a ten-page account of a tony robbins seminar feels like pushing it… and there were numerous digressions like this.
i realise these are harsh words, probably harsher than warranted.
so i’ll repeat it once more: this is a solid book. i learned a lot and identified with many passages. it even made my top ten of 2023. it’s just that i became a victim of my own expectations.
